To the Rule-Following Church Girl

For so many years, I had a bad religion without a good relationship. 

I was a rule-following church girl who worked really hard to do the right things so that I would get the right results. 

I mean, isn’t that how the Christian life works?  You go to church, read your bible, pray and have a daily quiet time, and then you’re blessed and have a good life. Right?

Not so much…

God is not a math equation and formulas never work with Him.  

Lessons I learned the hard way after life’s crushing disappointments imploded every square inch of my carefully constructed belief system.  That’s when I became disillusioned, hopeless, and angry.  

Very angry.

I was mad at God. Why?  After all the striving to please God, why did He seem to abandon me again and  again?  Why did He answer the prayers of others, but not mine?

After wrestling with God through a very long, dark season, I finally realized that I was looking at Him as a list of requirements and longing for blessing, but He was looking at me as a precious daughter and longing for relationship.

I was striving to earn something that can only be received…God’s unconditional, perfect love. 

Can you relate? 

Have you ever struggled to measure up to a standard that you just couldn’t reach? 
Do you ever hear that voice saying you haven’t done enough? 
Do you believe God is disappointed in you?
Is the “Christian life” not quite what you expected?
Have you ever asked yourself why you can’t change?
Do you ever wonder what’s wrong with you?

Well, what if there is nothing wrong with you?

What if God loves you just the way you are?

What if there’s a better way to live the Christian life? 

Let me tell you, THERE IS A BETTER WAY! 

And that way is Jesus; losing the rule-following system of religion, and finding a grace-filled relationship with Him.

“But”,  I can hear you asking, “HOW”?  “How can I make this transition?”

And the answer is day-by-day, my friend.  Shifting from rule-following religion to a Jesus-following relationship is made day-by-day. 

This journey hasn’t been easy for me as a recovering performance junkie, but I’m learning how to daily experience the adventure of a deeper relationship with Jesus.

Over the next few weeks, I will be sharing more with you about what this journey looks like, the methods God uses to draw us to Himself, and the core foundation we need to embrace in order to unlock the treasures of our connection with Jesus.

If you’ve ever felt disappointed in the Christian life, if you’ve ever struggled to measure up to a standard, if you‘ve ever longed to know God’s love in a real way, you’re in the right place.  And I’m so glad we’re on this adventure together!

I would love to hear from you!  Does any of this resonate with you?  What is your biggest struggle or frustration in having a relationship with Jesus? Let me know your thoughts in the Comments box below.  I promise to read your response and prayerfully consider ways I can help.  And you never know–there may be hundreds of others just like you who you could help, just because you took the time to respond. 

I can’t wait to hear from you!


  1. Helen Tiede on January 11, 2021 at 2:56 PM

    Sounds like a great idea! During this dreaded covid season, I’ve tried so hard to ‘walk the straight and narrow’. I’m not saying I’ve veered off course, but during these scary times I’ve been fearful of straying. Our church gatherings have slowed down just like everything else has and meeting together is extremely important to me. We need each other for encouragement and for accountability. Doing a Bible study is definitely not the same and there is no one sitting beside me to offer their input. Personally, I don’t think covid or anything else should get in the way of Kingdom business.

    • TammyHerzig on January 12, 2021 at 2:45 PM

      Yes, we so desperately need each other! Face-to-face fellowship is so important. I have had to be very intentional and creative with new ways to do “kingdom business” until this whole thing passes.

      • Lavonne Osborn on January 13, 2021 at 7:06 AM

        Thank you so much for sharing some of your journey. I can honestly say you described my journey. The Lord has taken me from being so angry and disappointed with Him to worshipping Him at His feet. It has been a long journey for me and I still deal with way too much of my flesh. But He doesn’t let go of me nor has He ever! I was Just too blind to see Him. He had to remove the blinders.
        My biggest struggle is letting go more and more of my baggage and just enjoy life. Love more and laugh more.

        • TammyHerzig on January 13, 2021 at 1:30 PM

          So thankful He doesn’t let go in those dark times…and isn’t it interesting that we need to UNpack our bags for our journey with Him! Thank you for sharing.

  2. Liz Riley on January 13, 2021 at 10:10 AM

    Thank you Tammy so much, this is EXACTLY what I needed to hear as I’m on my third toxic enemy filled work environment, I trusted a co-worker on his word of how great a place it is just to be humiliated and my integrity questioned. Same thing wondering when God will give me the breakthrough.

    Whew it’s been a season of 5 years of stretching and peeling me………..BUT staying faithful and trusting, praying He will open the door to moving me to Omaha so I can be in my granddaughter’s lives. There is no reason to stay in KS. I can easily see why people give up………. You are amazing and doing kingdom work even during your most difficult season and I am so encouraged and inspired by you. Thank you!!!

    • TammyHerzig on January 13, 2021 at 1:34 PM

      Thank you for sharing, Liz. I’m so sorry for your experience. I know God has a plan for you in the midst of your pain. Keep your eyes on His! 5 years is a long time, but I believe He is revealing Himself to you in the darkness.

  3. Rita Fenn on January 27, 2021 at 11:27 AM

    Sounds good and I would like to participate.

    • TammyHerzig on January 27, 2021 at 1:45 PM

      Thank you, Rita, and it will be delivered straight into your inbox!

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